aft big day

ITsme
u all knew tt wed, 1st april was big day rite?
i kept myself busy. i dun wan2 think abt him. im really busy. really cant think abt him.
all e while..till..gui pushed me. i fell on my ankle. ouch. at that instant i cried. it hurts. really.
but, i dunno wad hurts. the fool tt gui gave me? or the 100th day? at that moment, i wasn't busy, my mind and body let go of myself. i hope he appeared in front of me. i hope he will help me up, nt jiao lian. perhaps im juz foolish, im juz dumb. bball is nt him. i cant play bball in memorable of him. i cant play bball imagining he's dere, sitting ouside the court watching. the fact is tt, he left. im here.
dumb rite? wats w me. let him see this, he will laugh at me. will he mock at me? perhaps i shud pick myself up, and go.
easy said? ya. now, 103th day. still thinking of him. will it b till the next 100? i dunno. when can i let go? i dunno.
back to now. i shud jump out of my imagination. everything is illusion. dun think too much. nt now, nt future. perhaps in the history. if he's dumb, wats me?
i hope he googled jiawei, YJC. i ve made it easy to find my blog online, ve he? i hope he wont rmb me, and move on. but how much i wish he read my blog and tag me. how i wish i picked my my courage, and emailed him. blueocean977@hotmail.com. i can remember this off my fingertips. i dun nid any reference. tt's juz the stupid me.
im sorry for being e dumb ass. im sorry for liking u. im sorry if im a stress to u. im sorry if im a burden to u. im sorry for loving u. sorry.
heard frm qianyuan tt u ve finished all ur papers ytd..i hope u did well. i hope u will score. i hope i could msg u to ask u how things went. i din wan2 get ur number frm qianyuan. i wan2 msg me. i noe tt u knew tt i ve got auto-mobile. i cant msg cross country. tt's wad i dream abt everynite. waking up, readin the msg u be send me. i dream.
庄生梦蝶。。everything is lyk a dream in e mist. 醒来后，不知是实，是虚。