do i still miss him??

ITsme

After so long, i have finally return to blog. Perhaps its sth outdated alr, but i juz wan2 tok to sum1. maybe no one sees this, coz im nt telling any1 im back.

hi.

this is jiawei, in the christmas nite. all alone, thinking abt things that are horrible.
i have been wasting my time all this time, nt working, and not making any improvement in my life. Other than crapping it out. gosh.

i visited my facebook. viewed fwens fotos. disappointed. why am i fat? or to say, plum?? how can i slim down, and not be worried of how my tummy shows? or how i hide them.. ><

putting that aside. i oso when to visit this long gone fwen.
Yea, him. he have let go of the past, i shud too. but i cant. why??
dumb dumb. he ve got a new frien, of the same name as me. but it doesnt affect, does it. 10yrs down the road, will he rmb me? the fwen tt only known for 10mths. im not confident. i dun dare to look for him, coz im not confident tt when he speaks to me agn, my heart wont beat a irregular tempo.

basketball camp few days ago. after alumnia match, a little dispute w sah and shell. perhaps they din noe, i cired. alone at the court behind, at the track i last saw him. i cried coz basketball, reminded me of him. second time. im at this camp without him. once we played tgt, once he sat thru the game viewing my play, once i sat by the side, cheering for him. ONCE. thats e only memory i have. once... we din ve the time, we din ve the chance. or to say me.

horrible feeling. horrible. why do i miss him so terribly? its abt time to let go..let go..let go.. long time ago, this mission shud be done long time ago. not now.

christmas nite. alone, thinking of him.

wad is he doing??

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